This is the follow-up to Out of Pocket.
Click here to checkout Out of Pocket.
I don’t wear make-up to Bible Study cause the church’s around the corner. I do however where make-up when I’m hanging out. I found out about Saturday Night minutes before Pastor B. got started. I’d just finished yelling at them for not knowing about the fashion show. When Saturday finally came I ripped my room apart while trying on everything I owned. I settled on an outfit around the time the event started and headed out towards dad’s car. I parked it in front of the house last night but it was no where in sight but Kylie’s car was parked in it’s spot.
I did my best not to cry but I could barely see but I managed to pull myself together to book a ride. I called Kylie right after to curse her out but lil’ sis never answered her phone. I arrived at the Bowling Alley shortly after: the ride was fifty but I tipped him twenty. I figured it was the least I could do for sniffing the whole way there, he just smiled and bid me good night. I looked for him as soon as I got inside then passed him when my heart skipped a beat.
“A calm down, you totally got this”
I took a deep breath and headed over to him. I never offically made it to him cause I recognized some members from Bible Study so I stopped to hug each one. He noticed me while I was talking to the dance instructor but waited till I gave him my full attention.
“So you finally made it”
“Go get some shoes so we can start”
I ran to the restroom then grabbed some shoes and returned to him. He stared at me most of the night but spent the rest of it chatting with others. I got jealous every time he wasn’t looking at me. I remembered that I needed to make friends so I could get a ride home so I introduced myself to the rest of the congregation. They all recommended Pastor B so I braced myself and walked over to him.
“Hey Pastor B, can you give me a ride home?”
“Let me ask someone, I’m sure we can get you a ride”.
Hurt and defeated I smiled my response and watched him ask the same ones nearby. I wanted to be alone with him even if it was just a ride so it hurt when he turned me down. I shut myself off emotionally from him and pulled out my phone, smiling as I sent texts and responses through Facebook. I probably should’ve stopped cause I could tell he was hurt cause he stared at me while talking to someone else. I did however remain conscious enough to keep up with my turn not caring as much when I bowled a gutter ball. He finally came over to me to tell me he found me a ride home. I smiled my response and smiled at my phone once again. He stood there a moment watching me as if he wanted to say something but he finally turned around and walked away.
I totally fucked up that night but I put out a fork-full of cash and the dude everyone recommended dissed me. Fortunately I’m an emotional wreck and can only go so long without seeing him. So I get uncomfortable with being uncomfortable and see him.
Click here to check out Seeing Pastor B.
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